Grumpy Old Men In A Broken World
At the moment we all sense ourselves existing in a hostile, “dog eat dog” world, each of us constantly fighting, competing for resources and survival. We all succeed at the expense of others. We see reality around us as fragmented, disjointed, without an obvious overall cohesion, direction.
This is not surprising since by default we are all born with a fully self-serving, self-justifying nature. And this nature, it’s egocentric pleasure/pain operating software creates a completely personal, introverted and subjective perception of reality.
We are all in our own individual black holes, fortresses, only making contact with each other when it is necessary, based on mutual self-interest and even then we approach one another with utmost mutual distrust. As soon as the mutual self-interest is gone the contact is severed.
We behave like “grumpy old people”, constantly being unhappy with others, as those others don’t behave the way we expect them to. We are “grumpy” because those others don’t like us, appreciate us according to our own selfish, subjective expectations. Thus it is not surprising that the world we perceive is broken, full of suffering and crisis, never agreeing with the desired “dream state” we imagine for ourselves.
There is another way of perceiving reality. We could perceive other people, and the whole world around us as a mother perceives her children. A mother is in constant, 100% acceptance towards her “babies” regardless of what they are doing, how they behave. The mother’s perception is through constant movement towards the children, running to embrace them, providing them with shelter, selfless support and unconditional love.
Every problem, accident, mischief is only increasing the mother’s love and commitment. Even when she is angry, upset with her children, that anger is covered, sweetened with love, and she is ready to justify her beloved ones above everything all the time. For the smitten, love sick mothers the world surrounding their beloved children is always rosy, full of hope, as they constantly try providing a safe nest for them, being always optimistic about their future prospects.
This motherly love is fully instinctive. If the children of others behaved exactly the same way as her own, causing problems, mischief, the same forgiveness and unconditional justification doesn’t work any more. Instead the usual negative judgement, criticism – that is the default state in between people – appears, takes over.
Human Experiment On Small Scale
Today in the globally integrated and fully interdependent world we can’t survive as “grumpy old men” any more, rejecting, despising one another. We need to build selfless, unconditionally, mutually serving interconnections in order to build mutually complementing collaborations with each other. Without such cooperation we won’t be able to solve our mounting global problems, and our collective survival is in danger.
But what hope is there in trying to create a human society where everybody relates to everybody else through such unconditional, unrestrained, loving embrace? How could we artificially, proactively build such “motherly love” for other people we view at present with disdain and suspicion, when even the instinctive motherly love only works through “blood connections”?
Obviously building such “supernatural” – above the instinctively distrusting, judgmental nature – mutual connections can’t happen in large masses of people all at once. Such unique human experiment need to unfold in small, selected groups at first, with people who consciously commit to building such “artificially loving” interconnections.
In small, mutually supportive and mutually committed circles of people it is possible to build initially artificial “loving connections” in between people, that can later turn to become true “bonds of love”.
The love we talk about is very different from the usual “hormonal infatuation” most people consider love in our world. All “loving connections” we observe – from the romantic “first love” through the instinctive “motherly love” to “loving fish” because it tastes good – agree with our inherently self-serving, egoistic nature.
We love something that gives us pleasure, which fulfills us or provides us with some sort of reward. Without such selfish rewards we simply can’t “love” as we have no fuel for our inherently selfish nature.
The “real love” we need to reach which only the “motherly love” from our world comes close to, is a completely selfless, altruistic connection to others without any rewards or even reassuring feedback. In a truly loving connection one exists within the desires and necessities of another, fulfilling those necessities, desires perfectly as they arise in that other, without any selfish, subjective calculations or distortions.
Such perfect, “true love” is unsupported by one’s inherently selfish, egoistic nature. It needs to be built, acquired, purchased on top of, against one’s inherent nature. The above mentioned unique, small, mutual human circles provide the “laboratory”, with practical, scientific method, “instruction material”, and an authentic guide in order to acquire such a “supernatural” ability in connecting to others.
By using the inherent “negative” human characteristics of envy, jealousy, lust for respect from others, shame people can gradually pull, push each other our of their egoistic comfort zones. Through play acting selfless, altruistic mutual care, service towards one another, through the invested effort they can build the necessary connections. The evolving mutual dependency then gradually turns into “brotherly bond”, mutual trust preparing the necessary foundations.
In truth even building this selfless, altruistic loving connection necessitates some kind of a reward, as without fuel, positive aspiration one can’t move, act or exist. But this reward is very different from what we are used to in our present state.
Obviously at the beginning of the process even these pioneers need a usual, selfish, egoistic aspiration, hope in a reward for themselves. And what they can hope for is a completely different, qualitatively much higher existence and perception in a dimension that is incomprehensible for people through their inherent nature.
Existence, perception through “embracing others”, existence through selfless, altruistic connection compared to our present worldview gives one access to a mutual, collective experience. This experience can be partially compared to sensing life as a human being instead of sensing life as a cell in one of the body’s organs. While one is an extremely limited, subjective, temporary existence, the other is an unlimited, multi-dimensional and potentially eternal life-form.
Though the acquired selfless, altruistic, unconditionally serving interconnections, people build a state of mutual guarantee based on the evolving mutual trust towards one another. Such mutual guarantee in turn would give them full access to the integrated network of the vast, cosmic natural universe, as mutual guarantee is the system’s default state. And similarity of form provides seamless integration.
Thus the first, still “selfish” rewards is a kind of “quantum existence” and “quantum perception” above time, space or physical motion through such a full natural integration within the cosmic system. But as they refine, stabilize their adhesion, integration within the system and they gradually help more and more people to join them, also integrating within the natural system, they start to reveal a new type of “unselfish” reward.
Humanity’s gradual integration within nature’s cosmic system, from the viewpoint of the system is felt like “healing”, curing a destructive cancer that was previously threatening to cause major, potentially terminal damage. People through their intimate integration within the system can sense how by adding each and every new person, embracing ever deeper layers of reality to themselves, including them in the mutual guarantee they give greater and greater relief, contentment to the system.
And this contentment they cause, the relief, healing they facilitate with their selfless, unconditionally serving existence, action becomes the reward they work for. They become the altruistic agents, guardians of the system.