Flowing Through


Untouchable Pleasures

Our basic matter, our fuel driving us through life is a desire for pleasure for ourselves. We are like a bottomless black hole with a personal, individual gravitational field, constantly drawing everything towards ourselves, filtering, calculating what fits our egocentric pleasure/pain principle.

And the system, the world we exist in is designed in such way that it is full of pleasures, opportunities to fill ourselves. We are standing opposite to a vast, cosmic “vending machine” that can give us everything we want. And this everything, all the treasure, bounty around is presently incomprehensible, untouchable for us.

What we are capable of touching, tasting is only simple, fleeting morsels compared to what we could receive. But at the moment our reception of pleasures is limited, moreover most of the time we are actually experiencing suffering, emptiness, lack of fulfilment instead.

Burning Shame

There are three main reasons for this.

The first one is shame. Shame is a uniquely human notion, that doesn’t exist in animals. It comes from our proud, self-conscious nature. We simply can’t tolerate when we are lower than others. As we constantly keep measuring ourselves to others, such shame awakens frequently, giving us incentives to act.

But the worst shame strikes us when we are given free presents, charity without the capability, possibility of returning the favor somehow. Such free present, bestowal, charity lowers us to the ground, pulverizes us as if we didn’t exist.

It is especially true when we know for certain that we received such “free gift”, charity we can’t reciprocate from a benefactor, source that gives us out of selfless, unconditional love without any hidden motive. The resulting shame, when we are unable to give back or even reciprocate the loving intention of the benefactor burns our self-esteem in an intolerable manner.

Limited, Conflicting Receptive Capabilities

The second reason is the very limited reception potential in our individual vessels. We are built in a way that as soon as we start receiving fulfilment for our own desires, hunger, that yearning immediately starts lessening, evaporating until it completely dissipates.

Then we even feel over-satiated, nauseated for a while, unable to take on more. In relation to pleasures resulting from food, sex we have plenty of examples about this. We also know from history the extreme Roman practice of willfully inducing vomiting after meals, so they could continue feasting overcoming to this “personal pleasure limitation”. Thus in our present receptive vessels we can’t contain more than those fleeting morsels we keep chasing during our life.

The third reason is the fact that we don’t exist in this world alone. We share this system with others who are operated, driven by the same matter, also trying to fulfill themselves to the maximum. And that makes us reciprocal competitors with everybody else for resources and survival.

At the same time today we revealed that we evolved into a globally integrated and fully interdependent system with those competitors, complicating our situation even further. Most of the time we are fulfilling ourselves at the expense of others, while they do so at our expense.

Simple Selfless Solution

How can we solve these three problems, clearing the way in between our insatiable black holes and the infinite bounty available for it? It is clear that we have an infinite desire for pleasures and we are told we exist in a reality filled with infinite bounty. Thus what we need is a receptacle, the properly prepared vessel, conductor in between the desire and the pleasure.

We can solve all the above mentioned problems with a single stroke. We can continue receiving, moreover we can start receiving in a completely unlimited, non-conflicting way, and even do away with shame. Simply we have to start receiving, accepting the infinite bounty for others instead of ourselves.

As soon as I stop being the end station, the final stop for all the pleasures, but instead I draw everything towards myself in order to pass it onto others, all the problems are solved. I don’t have to be ashamed any longer since not only it is not me who receives charity from others, but by passing the pleasures into others, by asking for the sake of others I become a bestower, giver myself.

I don’t need to worry about my own, limited vessels becoming satiated, clogged up with the received satisfaction. I never retain anything but pass it over to others. I remain empty, still I taste all the pleasures while they flow through me.

And since it is not only me, but everybody around me who takes part in the same action of receiving in order to bestow, there are no conducts any longer, we don’t succeed at the expense of one another, but we help each other succeed at our own expense. But although I don’t ask anything for myself, through the others I receive everything I need.

The True Pleasure

But the greatest pleasure, the true infinite bounty is the fact that through reaching equivalence of form with the bestowing source of reality we reveal, attain this force. Since by passing on all what we receive to others in intention we become bestowers that makes us similar to the source of life.

We can’t replace this source, we can’t even reveal it directly. But by acting like it we start sensing what it is like to be a source towards another, what it means to bestow to others unconditionally. It is this similarity, attaining what it means to be the source of life that is the greatest possible reward in life, and reaching it is our purpose of existence.


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